ForEver
by fakescorpion
Summary: Spoilers for 4x20, 4x22. 5S. Mostly from Jimmy's POV, looking at Castiel from Angel of the Lord, Angel the Outlaw, Angel the Fallen, to finally become Archangel of Heaven.
1. With Thee from Heaven

_disclaimer: I don't own SPN or any of its characters_

_Spoilers for 4x20, 4x22. 5S (in later chapters) mostly from Jimmy's POV, looking at Castiel from Angel of the Lord, Angel the Outlaw, Angel the Fallen, to finally became Archangel of Heaven. No pairings for now but Jimmy/Castiel and slightly implied Dean/Castiel in later chapters. Rated T to be safe. Will eventually be a future!fic in the final chapter._

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_**ForEver**_

**Chapter One. With Thee from Heaven**

It had seemed to be so simple, to believe and to have faith in God and His angels. Jimmy Novak had been taught so since he was only a kid to have faith. To love God. To obey and do his work.

He had been simply thrilled when an angel spoke to him that he couldn't begin to realize the consequences behind those words from the foreign language that he didn't know he understood.

It used to be such a simple thing, to believe and to have faith in God and His angels. But it wasn't anymore; it wasn't from the moment he gave his consent and let the angel in.

_"I am not your father."_

Castiel had said to Claire before he shut Jimmy out and it broke his heart to see the hurt on his daughter's innocent eyes.

And Jimmy Novak lost his family. This was the last thing he knew before the angel's Grace wrapped around his soul and put him into oblivion.

Jimmy's consciousnesses were few and far between. If he got lucky, he could get a glimpse of the outside–it was irony to think the world as the outside; and his own fucking _mind_ as the inside–but usually only when Castiel was distracted enough to…um…let his guard down and let the human mind surface and feel (though still not control).

During the first few days when Castiel was still testing (exploring) his newly-acquired body, Jimmy could feel hunger and thirst as well as other physical needs, which Castiel chose–deliberate or not–to ignore, pulling the alarm and screaming at him during those flitting moments between the bright darkness. He was thirsty and starving, cold on the skin but too hot with Castiel's burning Grace inside, his eyes were too dry from the angel's lack of blinking they hurt, and his eardrums sometimes burst when he was force into a high-speed flying trip.

Thankfully, the problems solve themselves after a few weeks when his body grew tired of protesting and organs seemed to decide the best solution was to just shut down one-by-one. It was a relief from the pain, but Jimmy wasn't sure whether it was a good thing.

Then Jimmy had to endure a new round of agony. Being shot with rock-salt and iron-rounds, stabbed and sliced like a toy, and for a vicious hook to went through his shoulder and spine that could surely kill a human, not to mention the breaking of all his rib-bones when some other guy's nerd-angel just happened to want to beat his up!

Between the brief pain of wakefulness and the dark-bright ignorance that made up most of his time. Jimmy tried hard to not think about the family he had lost.

When Castiel left him one day, suddenly and without warning, he felt…broken.

No…not like heart-broke broken. Just broken.

His body had forgotten how to work without the angelic Grace within. He noticed that the moment a hand touched his shoulder and he flinched away in alarm. He noticed that the moment he drawn in a breath and his chest screamed in pain. He noticed that his heart protested with every beat. Every single beat.

Worse still, his conscious felt alone and half-empty–no, more than half, it was like there was a gapping hole the size of Grand Canyon somewhere inside of him. And cold, so cold it was freezing without the warming Grace.

And Jimmy knew he was damaged and broken both physically and mentally.

Eating and drinking were the first few steps to restart his body but still–deep down he knew–he was too far gone, he was beyond repair. Throwing up and emptying his stomach later that day only confirmed to that.

_"__I'm done. Okay? With demons. Angels. All of it. I just want to go home.__"_

When Jimmy told the Winchester brothers, it was literally his dying wish. He wasn't sure how long he could still keep his body and mind functioning. Weeks? Days? Jimmy just wanted to see his family once more and he would embrace death with open arms.

_"All we're saying is that until we figure this out, the safest place is with us."_

They didn't understand.

_"How long?"_

_"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it."_

When Jimmy heard the answer, he almost chocked out his disbelief. They really didn't fucking understand. They'd been fighting demons all their lives and didn't they notice the human hosts usually died even if said demons were exorcise? And demons usually spent time eating and breathing!

When Jimmy went to sleep–or at least pretended to (he seemed to have forgotten how to fall asleep without angel-powers forcing him into one)–under the Winchester brothers' intense stare, all he could think about were chances were he wouldn't wake up in the following morning.

However, at half past four in the dead of the night, something miraculous happened and lured the younger Winchester out of the room, leaving Jimmy free to slip out unnoticed. He just wanted to see his family again, even if it was the last time.

Every step he took as he dragged himself up the porch-steps was like infinity. He saw Claire and Amelia–with eyes that he could control and focus–through the window. He saw them and thought them beautiful.

He wasn't sure what he had in mind when he rang the doorbell. It wasn't possible for him to return to the life he had before, all was too late.

_"I'm so sorry."_

And he meant it.

But he was forced to lie. Lie to his wife. Lying. It had been a long time since he last lied. Castiel didn't–hadn't–and it felt so _wrong_. But Jimmy still did it.

_"Daddy, aren't you gonna to say grace?"_

Such a simple question, and it brought tears into Jimmy's. And he was forced to lie again, this time to his daughter. He wasn't happy. He was conflicted and in pain and alone.

But the demon that _dared_ to walk into his house didn't give him time to sort out his jumbled thoughts. And Jimmy could suddenly felt rage and fear and confusion and all the negative emotions that had become so unfamiliar in the past year over-flowed and that he just snapped and start bashing the demon's head with a cupper statue he got his hands on.

Strangely, he still could only remember bits and pieces even without Castiel deliberately shut him out of 'here and now'.

_"Demons will never stop, you can never be with your family. So you neither get as far away from them as possible, or you put a bullet in your head."_

When the younger Winchester said those cruel words, funny enough, the first thing that went through Jimmy's mind was 'Suicide is a sin!' and nothing else. But he knew then that it was the time for him to part with his family. And probably his life.

As Jimmy tried to rest in the backseat of the Winchesters' car. He couldn't help feel sorry for himself. How totally screwed and messed-up his life had become. He couldn't eat without throwing up; he couldn't breathe without his chest aching; he couldn't lie without feeling extremely guilty; hell he couldn't even rage without lashing out at someone! Even if the demons weren't after him, he would surely still hurt Amelia and Claire, whether he liked it or not. They were really best left alone.

When he received the phone call, however, Jimmy was struck by the fact that even with his leaving, he was still hurting his family. The mistake wasn't with his leaving or staying; the mistake had already been made year ago, the moment he said 'Yes'.

It was Castiel's fault. And Jimmy couldn't help himself screaming names into the air like it was the most normal thing in the world.

_"Castiel, you son of a bitch! You promise my family will be okay! You promise you're going to take care of them! I gave you everything you asked me to give, I gave you more! This is the thanks I get? This is what you do? This is your Heaven?"_

He wasn't sure he even expected an answer.

_"Help me, please…just help me."_

And Jimmy still walked alone.

The shot was more of a shock than pain. Of course it was painful, but it wasn't the worse that Jimmy had to endure. He was thinking how sorry he felt for Amelia and Claire, how angry and frustrated for Castiel, and how simply hopeless for himself in the time of dying.

And Castiel came. Shamelessly watching through Claire's eyes.

_"No…Claire."_

_"She's with me now."_

Jimmy was lying on the ground in a messy heap, bleeding on the dusty floor of the abandon factory, dying but couldn't begin to imagine what it would be like for Claire if he just died. All the horror and pain and torture he had to endure from last year would surely befall onto his sweet daughter, and he couldn't stand the mere thought of it.

_"Please, Castiel…if you need just take me…take me, please…"_

Jimmy begged–any kind of suffer…sacrifice…was acceptable as long as he could spare Claire from the agonizing pain of being an angel's vessel.

_"I want to make sure you understand, you won't die…or age. If last year is painful for you, picture hundreds, thousands more like it."_

_"Doesn't matter…you take me…just take me!"_

_"As you wish."_

Jimmy didn't regret the decision he had made then. He never regretted it–especially during the darkest hours–but it didn't mean he was prepared for it. He thought he had been, but he wasn't.

The familiar presence of the heavenly creature didn't immediately wrap his Grace around the dying man like a suffocating blanket of dark and light. Castiel turned his–their–head and watched as Amelia practically ran to hold Claire in her arms, sketching the picture in greatest details into his angelic mind and giving Jimmy one last memory of his family.

Jimmy knew then that Castiel would preserve the memory for him, for as long as he wished. It was a blessing, but it was also a curse. And it might–one day–be the only thing that would prevent him from going insane.

Then, just like the year before, Jimmy lost himself in the darkness that seemed too bright and stretch on forever, wasn't allowed to sense or feel, trapped in his own mind and body and thought no more.

The next time Jimmy got a chance to take a peek, he found Castiel slicing his left forearm. He was freaked and the emotion just happened to match that of Castiel's rare conflicting uncertainty. Seconds later he was blocked out again, but this time it was short–like the moment before he doze off, he was immediately been violently shook awake again. As brilliant white light flood through the window with a high-pitch Enochian screech, Jimmy understood the reason for his sober: even if it was only Castiel's subconscious–do angels even _have_ subconscious?–the angel didn't want to die alone.

Surprisingly, Jimmy didn't mind. He had vowed he would willingly open his arms and welcome death.

So he did.

And he didn't mind the angel by his side.

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_Okay...so I wrote this while practically dozing off. Thx for reading, please R&R._


	2. With Thee the Outcast

___disclaimer: I don't own SPN or any of its characters_

___Spoilers for 5x01, 5x02, 5x03, 5x06, 5x08, 5x10, 5x13, 5x14, 5x16, 5x17, 5x18 ____Jimmy's having mixed feelings for Castiel and the Winchester brothers_

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******_ForEver_**

******Chapter Two**. With Thee the Outcast

Jimmy blinked in his surroundings. It was a high school corridor with polished tiles that seemed to glow when the late-noon's sunshine drift across the floor, with white-washed walls that were spotless–which were kind of odd for a school but Jimmy didn't notice it then–and mahogany wooden doors. Kids streamed around him chatting about friends and games and homework, not a worry in the world.

Jimmy was confused and thought himself out of place…until someone called out his nickname.

_"Hey, Jim!"_

Jimmy curiously turned toward the caller and saw David waving at him with a broad smile on his face. David, the kid who had been his friend in high school. But…it wasn't possible! It…oh. And the realization and all that had happened came crashing down on him. The prophet, the archangel…dying…dead.

If he were dead, did it mean he was in Heaven now? (Jimmy dared not think of the possibility that he might be in Hell.) He looked around again and the last puzzle fell into place: this was his high school–no, not his _actual_ high school but the high school as he remembered–and it was the day he met Amelia. So he did as he did in his memery and walked casually toward David…and an energetic young (and beautiful and charming and gorgeous and–Jimmy could came up with a thousand different adjectives there and then) girl with amazing blond hair rushed past and accidently dropped the books in her arms when she carelessly bumped into him.

And tears fell like raindrops as Jimmy helped Amelia pick up her books.

_"Thanks."_

A single word, and Jimmy thought everything was finally going to be okay.

Or so he thought.

The hand that landed itself on his shoulder was so _not_ suppose to be there and it immediately filled him with dread. The man behind him dressed in suit and tie and long cloak was wrapped totally in black and with an uttered 'Jimmy Novak?' which sounded more like a statement than question, dragged Jimmy away from his dream.

Who are you and what do you want with me? Jimmy wanted to ask but before he could squeeze out anything, the man answered as though he could read minds–which he probably could.

_"I am Azrael, the archangel who is the agent of death. It was I that admits those who shall come into Heaven and banishes those who didn't belong through the Golden Gates. It was not I who decide who shall stay and who shall go, for angels do not judge, but the words of God."_

As if _that_ made it _just_! Jimmy was boiling with rage. For all that he had given up and sacrificed, he was going to be damned in _Hell_? And he almost lashed out at the archangel for saying such crap! He was so out of practice for handling emotions.

However, the archangel seemed–if only a little–bemused by Jimmy's emotional outburst and calmly went on to say there was just a slight misunderstanding between them.

Azrael wasn't going to damn him to Hell. It was something–if possible–worse. And no! It was _not_ okay with Jimmy and he could only ask 'Why? Why me?'.

_"God had given the word for your resurrection, you cannot give your consent if you were dead."_

If Castiel were God's favorite child, Jimmy would surely be His least favorite.

And yes, Jimmy gave his consent for it was either him or his child and he knew–deep down in his heart–how easily an angel could force people to _obey_.

The next thing he knew, he was holding an Angel Blade–and _fuck_ it wasn't a short silver dagger anymore but a burning, blazing, white-hot metal that peeled off the very skin of his palm at touch (God, that hurts!) and his eyes seemed to be scorched right out of his skull at the mere sight of its torching white flame–and an angel exploded–yes, exploded! The vessel didn't but the angel did–in his hands, blowing incinerated feathers everywhere.

Castiel killed an angel. No, two angels! Shock was Jimmy's last thought before he was blocked out again.

However, it wasn't long before Jimmy realized something serious was off. The angelic presence within and around him used to feel like a strait-jacket that was tight–binding–if not suffocating, but it wasn't anymore. Now, it felt no more than a loose suit, like the tan trench coat that the angel seemed to have grow fond of.

For some reason, the angel had grown weak. All powerless compared to his once upon glory.

Then, Castiel told the Winchester brothers and the old hunter Singer that he had been cut off from Heaven for his rebellion and explained it all. Though he made it sound like it was no big deal–okay fine, he couldn't heal people anymore, but he could still fly around scaring demons out of their wits–but Jimmy knew better. Castiel could lead the Winchesters into believing he was still in one piece but not Jimmy, for he could feel what used to be iron walls of bright darkness were now silk-woven muslin that might break at the touch.

Then it happened. And Jimmy knew the angel's estate was far worse than he thought.

Frustration.

The angel was _feeling_ and it was _wrong_. But Dean just didn't understand. Dean being the smart ass just didn't understand.

Frustration. Disappointment.

Emotions chapped through the eggshell that enveloped Jimmy's consciousness like poison and shattered the weak prison and leave the human mind shocked in wakefulness.

_"__I killed two angels this week. My brothers. I'm hunted. I rebelled…and I did it__–__all of it__–__for __you__. And you__ failed__. You and your brother destroyed the world. And I lost __everything__–__for nothing. So keep your opinions to yourself."_

For once, Jimmy felt sorry for Castiel.

Nothing much happened after that day as the angel and his vessel set out to find God–at least nothing that Jimmy's aware of. For even if emotions were angels' weaknesses–though Jimmy doubted that the possessing angel knew–and could easily cause the mental barriers of the weakened angel to shatter–again, Jimmy doubted that the possessing angel was aware–but technically, Castiel got rather little of them as long as he's away from the Winchesters (the elder Winchester to be exact), so most of the time Jimmy still drifted in and out of oblivion.

Then words of Raphael reached their ears.

Which in turn lead to Castiel's visit of Dean in a hotel room to ask for help trapping the archangel. However, it was until later when they were at St. Pete's Hospital did Jimmy woke up.

It was 'worry' that pulled him out this time as Dean asked if he was also going to be like the-shell-of-a-man Donny Finnerman after Michael jumped his meat suit.

Yeah, Castiel was worried and it made Jimmy unhappy. He couldn't believe _his_ angel was worried about other angel's dress when his own coat really, really, _really_ needed a time out. Talk about jealousy. No, that's not right…whatever.

The second time Dean pissed Jimmy off without knowing happened only a few hours later when he took Castiel to a brothel, and Jimmy was strongly reminded of the phrase 'The road to Hell is paved with good intentions'. Castiel went along willing with Dean's absurd plan because the angel thought him as a friend but the mixture emotion of shock and fear and embarrassment and uncertainty easily overwhelmed the brittle cage that held Jimmy captive and Jimmy thought he would have strangled Dean for corrupting the freaking angel if he had a body of his own. Thankfully, things didn't go as Dean had planned or he was _sure_–corporal or not–he _would_ have beheaded that Michael Sword who was a poor-excuse-of-a-man.

It was the first time, however, that Jimmy heard low buzzing braided into the background noise when he gain conscious, but he soon dismissed it as nothing of importance.

How wrong he was.

Anger.

Jimmy knew it–this–was a dangerous emotion for a human to have let along an angel but when this…_thing_…actually came clawing through, he still wasn't–hadn't been prepared and it leave him practically screaming at Castiel to STOP FUCKING WITH HIS MIND!

But no, Castiel was too weak–too powerless–to touch or feel the screaming human soul and he himself was drowning in the sea of anger and fear.

Angry at the younger Winchester's refusal to kill the Cambion; fear for the Host of Heaven–his family–that might one day lay to waste.

The buzzing and humming from before grew louder but Jimmy didn't take notice 'cause there was the bigger and more pressing matter in which his mind was being flung around in a tornado. It seemed like a one-way street where the angel's emotions were magnified by a thousand before came crashing onto Jimmy while Castiel had the blessing of oblivion the other way around. Now Jimmy knew why the angel covered him with his wings all the time–or tried to.

He's in for another shock only minutes later when Castiel confronted Jesse Turner.

The kid looked just…_awful_.

And Jimmy only wished to pass out then when that child's face made all the ghost and horror movies he had ever seen look like silly cartoons.

It was a long time later did it struck him that he was seeing things through Castiel's angelic sight.

It was 'disappointment' again when Castiel looked at the brother who was trapped in a ring of Holy Fire, the brother who had escaped home two millennia ago and never came back. And as Castiel watch, so did Jimmy see. Wings magnificently pure-white and glowing with feathers like steel blade as well as cotton silk, reflected all-lights yet transparent, stretched on through the walls and ceilings from behind Gabriel yet didn't really pass the boundary of the flaming ring. It was like a living miracle.

Jimmy then noticed another pair behind his own–growing out of but not really touching–back, a pair that was smaller but no less breathtaking, with an extended quality of a mist-like haze (but it was rather later did he know the haze was in fact molting feathers and it was the result of decaying power).

All the while the humming grew louder it was now more like whispers.

After that, Jimmy was seeing Reapers. But it was days later when he saw the creepy and unnerving sight of hundreds of them in one place at the same time, standing still as statues, did he decided that he had had enough and would really like to poke his newly required angel-eyes out. He, apparently, could not and was forced to went along with Castiel when the angel decided to unfurl his–their?–wings to chase after a particular suspicious Reaper and land himself in an angels' trap.

Then Jimmy thought saw the most wondrous and beautiful thing in existence. He knew it was also literally true.

_"Lucifer."_

Castiel confirmed it.

Lucifer. Satan. Lightbringer. The Morning Star.

He dimmed Raphael's fierce and easily dwarfed Gabriel's glory. Oh, how could such a magnificent creature be the Devil? Jimmy almost gasped before he thought it blasphemous.

It was the first time Castiel _lied_ (always, he would broke his own rules and did things for the sake of the Winchesters) and–standing before Lucifer–made him look all the more pitiful.

And yet…

_"What a peculiar thing you are."_

Lucifer thought him special. Unique.

After the Devil left, Castiel tried talking, seducing–anything–to free himself from the trap (again, he did it for the Winchesters), but Jimmy had known the angel mojo wouldn't work even before Castiel placed his hand upon that demon bitch's forehead. Heaven had long forsaken him.

For once, when the strong realization of abandonment finally struck Castiel, leaving him in grief and confusion and loneliness, Jimmy hated the Heaven. And he hated himself not be able to give a hand of comfort even though they were so close.

So close and yet so far apart.

He knew Castiel had long ago thought him gone.

The first time Jimmy gained control of his body ever since been possessed, Castiel didn't know and neither did the Winchesters.

_"…fine…much better than I expected…"_

Castiel was still trying to reassure the brothers (even with a half-lie), and for no specific reason it was making Jimmy uncontrollably mad. But before he could sent out his protest–though he doubted the angel would hear–Castiel totally and completely shut down–like dead, cease to exist shut down–leaving Jimmy alone to draw in shallow, rapid breaths that hurt and gushing blood onto the sidewalk with a spinning head.

_"He's breathing…sort of."_

Jimmy heard the younger brother made the obvious comment and thought 'Of course I'm breathing! I'm human! But this was absolutely NOT supposed to happen!' before he, too, fell unconscious. All the while worrying about the angel.

Weeks had passed before Jimmy blinked into the real world again and–with the newly addition of sorrow for the death of Anael and the guilt his angel felt for causing her death–it stunned him just how weak Castiel had become. It seemed like maybe, just maybe, with a push he could win over the control.

Jimmy never tried.

Emptiness. Longing. Happiness.

It was the three emotions that had been lured out by the Black Horseman Famine. And after the incident, Jimmy felt ashamed by his blind cravings for red meat. But secretly he felt glad for 'happiness' was the first positive emotion Castiel had felt and it was the first time the angel smiled.

Uncertainty. Doubt. Frustration. Disappointment. Worry. Shock. Fear. Embarrassment. Anger. Grief. Confusion. Loneliness. Sorrow. Guilt. Emptiness. Longing.

Happiness.

And Jimmy felt like crying.

But God just wanted to give the angel a final blow.

Faithless.

It was the final straw and the cage shattered completely.

Whispers. Murmurs. Voices. They all came clearly after that like there were a hundred people talking at the same time. Jimmy knew then what they were.

Prayers. Thoughts.

Prayers from all over the world. Thoughts from nearby people. And no they didn't blend in together like sounds were supposed to but every syllable of mind-sentences, every picturesque-thoughts were so clear that Jimmy felt like drowning and all the while long for the close-in, the blessed oblivion that would never came.

It was made even worse with the sight for now, he could see not only the supernatural but also feelings and emotions. And he knew then why angels weren't made to feel.

The contagious shade of sadness, the poisonous color of hostility. Though here and there would be a spike of pleasure but still, always tainted with a hue of self-loathing.

Jimmy suddenly couldn't understand why people–humans–spend so much time hating themselves. Hate their birth, hate their work, hate their school, hate the government, and as far as it went, hate their family. And people tended to hide them behind thin veils of deadly sins: Envy. Greed. Lust. Sloth. Wrath. Gluttony. And Pride.

_"I love all of God__'s creations.__"_

Castiel had said and now Jimmy understood. Angels don't love as humans do but still. And with every pint of self-loathing people felt for themselves, angels had to take, to accept, and to suffer.

If God were any less forgiving, everyone from priests to convicts were sure to be damned for causing His angels so much pain.

It was too much agony so angels no longer feel.

But Castiel had changed. And as he felt so did he suffer.

As the angel drained the sixty-sixth glass of alcohol like it was the sixth, Jimmy couldn't stand back to watch anymore and made to wrestle for control. However, whether he succeeded or not were forever lost in mystery for all he remembered before he lost conscious were the never-ending prayers and thoughts coming at him that were driving him mad and…

_"Shut the FUCK up!"_

Jimmy wasn't sure it was he who shouted it or Castiel shouting at him out loud.

Rage.

Dean Winchester would never know just how angry Castiel was that time when he made the decision to give-up. The anger Jimmy had felt before were nowhere near the rage Castiel was feeling now, and he had thought it couldn't possibly get any worse.

Rage. Disappointment. Betrayal.

The angel started to fell apart, crumbling from the finger tips.

_"I rebelled for this?" _

The angel had screamed. Screamed at Dean Winchester. For the first time ever.

_"So that you could surrender to them?"_

So much pain.

_"I gave everything for you. Everything."_

Castiel had given up his family, his _Father_.

_"And this is what you give to me.__"_

Disappointment.

Betrayal.

And it was the second time Castiel put his life at risk. For Dean.

And it was also the second time Dean wouldn't be there when he died.

But Jimmy would be.

Always.

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_I know most people thought Jimmy gone after Castiel's resurrection but I thought otherwise, for if Michael and Lucifer counldn't just take over the empty apartment after Dean and Sam died, there's no reason Castiel could._

_Sorry if jumping between the scenes make your head ache, it's just me trying to see things from Jimmy's POV and he's kind of flashing in and out._

_Reviews are loved, thx for reading._


	3. With Thee the Fallen

___disclaimer: I don't own SPN or any of its characters_

___Spoilers for 5x21, 5x22 Castiel means more to Jimmy than the man cares to admit. Mostly one-sided Jimmy/Castiel and implied one-sided Castiel/Dean_

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_**ForEver**_

**Chapter Three. With Thee the Fallen**

The murmurs and whispers were gone.

Pain and ache were back.

For once in a long while, Jimmy was sleeping. Not the forced oblivion but the actual sleep. Sleep with dreams…and nightmares.

_"__I'm going to gut your daughter while you watch.__"_

_"…no..."_

_"So watch."_

_"No!"_

However, the victim wasn't Claire and that wasn't the demon possessing his friend Roger doing the vivisection. But it was the same song. Same song with the same forlorn melody.

Castiel was weak–too weak–that he didn't even struggle as his brothers took him before the Gates of Heaven but as hands–claws–held onto the base of his left-wing to forcefully drag him out, he let out an ear-splitting screech. He wanted to resist even if it was the last thing he do.

Jimmy thought his body would split in two as the two forces work in different directions. Castiel were pulled out first by–if he were human–where the upper-back and shoulders-bones would be. Then his head and arms came loose but his claws sank stubbornly into Jimmy's shoulder, causing him immense pain yet not really hurting him physically.

Jimmy was in awe as he watched Castiel wrapped his pure-white and translucent arms bonelessly around and around his neck and chest like a child refusing to let go of his only toy. Silver strands of long water-like silk that glowed fell across Jimmy's face but weren't really touching and he realized it was the angel's hair. It was the very first time Jimmy saw Castiel and he thought the angel was the materialization of light and faith and loyalty and–though not as beautiful as Lucifer or Gabriel, but still–he was gorgeous.

Since the other angels couldn't fully force Castiel out, they let him hang there, like a sick butterfly half way out of its cocoon.

They didn't let him go at that, neither.

That was why–unlike last time–Jimmy wasn't away and had to watch when it started.

Angels weren't made to feel but for those who didn't understand obedience, emotions were the most severe punishment one could come up with. For that, 'guilt' and 'shame' and 'helplessness' were drilled into the lone angel, leaving him at the edge of total breakdown as he not only had to endure the emotions of one but that of six billions down on Earth.

Jake accidently broke his big brother Alan's CD but choose to remain silent, now he felt guilty when Alan and Jane got into a fight because of it. Matthew had gotten caught cheating on an exam and now he was ashamed. Will had been humiliated at work. Katherine prayed everyday ever since her mother left. Oscar was in prison but still felt guilty for the person he had accidently killed. Maggie talked behind Annie's back. Leo cheated on his wife. Ted had stolen when he was little. And Andrew. And Bella. And Alex. Sarah. Edward. Alice. Max Joey Jason Lindsey Simon Amanda Tom Maria Arthur MichaelJohnAndyJosephEric…

_"I'm sorry…I'm sorry…"_

Castiel's voice quivered as he whispered into his vessel's ear and asked for the forgiveness that would never come. How Jimmy wished to hold his hands but no, the sense of touch was beyond him.

_"I'm sorry…please…I'm sorry…I'm sorry…I'm sorry…"_

Heaven don't torture like Hell.

But the pain was the same if not more.

_"…please…make it stop…"_

Tears.

Jimmy was the first human–ever–to witness an angel cry. It wasn't wet like the salted water humans or other Earth-bound mammals do but wet like the change of angles in the reflecting light of defrosted snow or newly carved diamond. It was stunningly the most beautiful yet heart-breaking thing to see.

_"…please…"_

The blazing Angel Blade was handed over as Castiel begged and begged.

_"You know what you have to do to stop it. You know how to stop it."_

For a rebellious angel had no _right_ to die like an angel.

_"So fall."_

But an angel could only fall by his own choosing and the process was slow and agonizing.

So all the angels watched and waited in silence until Castiel could stand no more. He then made a move with trembling fingers and pierced his Grace with the burning blade, ripping his feathers out, one by one. Tears wet the dimming essence of angelic Grace like morning dew clung to blades of grass. He gasped and panted, letting the shame he felt washed over him for he had to do it in front of the whole of his family.

Jimmy was heart-wrecked.

Still, Castiel's feathers continued to fell. Fell like meteor shower around him.

But Jimmy couldn't stop himself as he watch the last feather fall. With an out-stretched hand, he saved one last flight-feather for his own.

And they fell.

Jimmy woke just when Castiel got off the phone and without even trying, his heart and hands and the whole of his body were under his control.

A feeling of surprise caressed Jimmy's thoughts and he knew it was part Castiel. The angel was surprised by Jimmy's presence, and surprised that the human vessel could so easily overpower him now.

So Jimmy waited–patiently as Castiel had always taught him–for the fight for control that didn't come. Hours later, even Jimmy started to grow uneasy.

_"Cas, you still here?"_

For an answer there came a wave of fatigue. Castiel could no more speak as Jimmy was before, but now–effectively human–he could try communicating with thoughts and emotions.

Jimmy wondered how much of his nightmare had been real.

Later, he set out to the task of testing his body and was thankful to discover it was different from the last time of his control, for the doctors and nurses of the hospital had cared for him though thought him brain-dead and had already slowly but surely return his body into functioning shape. Breathing didn't hurt anymore though he had a compare-to-last-time fairly small headache. Eating and drinking would not be a problem as long as he stayed away from spicy and oily foods, or so the doctors said. However, as he flexed his wrist, a single feather flew from between his fingers.

It was over two feet in length, half-transparent, glowing faintly white and sort of sparkling with sharp-looking sides. It was the flight-feather of an angel.

_"Cas? Castiel?"_

Jimmy asked softly but of course there was no answer.

He tried to touch the last of Castiel's angelic Grace but his fingers went through it as though it were air. Or hallucination.

Jimmy quickly dismissed the possibility of him imagining things as he had known it was the last thing that kept the angel–_his_ angel–with him. He remembered Anael (who later became Anna). An angel completely drained of Grace would surely loose the ability to possess, unlike what Castiel had become now.

If Castiel had truly fallen, he would be hunted down and killed probably before birth.

Jimmy shuddered at the thought. It was up to him to protect the angel now.

He stayed at the hospital for a long while, resting, until the old hunter–Bobby–use some methods to get him out, but almost immediately, Jimmy was overwhelmed by the irresistible strong urge to go somewhere. It didn't took him long to figure out what it was.

The Winchester brothers were after the Green Horseman Pestilence and Castiel wanted to be there to help.

It was for the sake of Dean Winchester. Again.

_"Why? Why is it always him? Don't you ever think anything for yourself? And don't you dare give me the righteous man crap. You're nearly human now, and you could start by making your own choice."_

Jimmy had only just said before he slammed himself into a solid brick-wall of blind loyalty. It seemed so child-like how the angel's mind work. There was a fight that his friends–companions–needed assistance so he would go. Things like 'don't have to' or 'might get hurt' or 'might die' never occurred to him.

Jimmy suddenly thought himself a total jerk if he objected to any of the fallen angel's wishes. It was literally the same as bullying a child.

Then there was this feeling when he got onto the bus.

Trust.

It wasn't the same trust Castiel felt for other angels–which was made in default but later crushed dramatically–or for Dean–which came with the loyalty for the righteous man. Nor was it the same as that for Sam or Bobby–which came through his trust for Dean. No, this particular trust was different, more like when a kid saw a specific stranger everyday at the park but never talked until one day they actually did, that friendly trust the kid might feel towards the stranger like they'd known each other for life.

It was weird but it was a nice feeling so Jimmy felt happy. Happy for himself. Happy for the angel.

Dean had tried, really he had, but even Jimmy could see that he was a miserable man with the weight of the whole world on his shoulders. No wonder Castiel learned doubt and hurt and confusion and fear and all those negative emotions Jimmy couldn't name from him.

Now, Jimmy had made up his mind to teach the angel the brighter side of humanity.

In what little time they had in the eleventh hour.

When they arrived just outside the nursing home by the name of Serenity Valley Convalescent Home–where according to Bobby was where Pestilence was said to be–Jimmy underwent a sense of nausea, which was probably the combination nervousness of both him and Castiel. He hoped he didn't arrive too late–no, he hoped he did arrive too late and the Winchesters had already finished the jobs. It didn't seem to be the case.

_"Afraid?"_

The fallen angel gave a feeling of denial when asked.

Jimmy knew Castiel was lying but chose not to comment. Instead, he made to trace the sharp edges of the angel feather that had always seemed to drift to and fro in the imaginary wind to keep to his side.

_"Don't worry. You're still warm."_

It wasn't literally true for the Grace that used to throb and burn just above his heart had long ago faded and cooled. But Jimmy wanted the angel to believe in his words.

The feeling just before he relaxed and let Castiel take control. It was 'gratitude'.

The nursing home was filled with dead bodies, but Castiel took no notice as he focused his thoughts on one thing and one thing only: protect the Winchesters.

Really just like a child. A simple thing would be enough to keep him going.

Then the door down the hallway was roughly shoved open and there was Pestilence…but the Horseman's power was too great and Castiel inevitably fell onto hands and knees coughing blood.

_"Well look at that, an occupied vessel but not a speck of angel left." _

No. It wasn't true.

Jimmy knew it. And he willed Castiel to acknowledge it.

And the feather landed on the demon-killing-knife like flower petal on water, giving Castiel enough strength to push himself up and–after grabbing the knife–slammed the Horsemen's hand on the table, slicing off the ring.

_"Maybe just a speck."_

It was all the Grace he needed to reave a Horseman's ring.

Jimmy spent some time musing himself with the ghost-of-a-feather during the Impala ride but let his attention wonder after they all got back to Bobby's. But hey, could you blame him? Nobody except Castiel knew he was there and since the fallen angel had gotten his favorite playmate–that is to say Dean–back, Jimmy was been pretty much ignored.

No, he was not jealous. Absolutely not!

After the old hunter told them the-good-news-that-sounded-bad and the sudden appearance of the demon Crowley, they began the preparation for their separate journeys: Dean and Crowley to Chicago for a go at Death's ring; Sam, Bobby–who, through Crowley, regained the ability to stand–and Castiel–with Jimmy as the tagalong–to the Niveus warehouse to stop the distribution of the vaccine for Swine Flu which was actually the Croatoan virus.

Castiel chose this time to mourn his misfortune and the drastic emotional collapse astonished even Jimmy. Sadly, Bobby's mistranslation of the fallen angel's words didn't help. Castiel never thought humans worthless–they were, after all, God's most perfected creations–but the vulnerability in fights frightened him. He didn't have any experience in human combats and he was afraid to be the reason for failure.

Self-loathing.

It was the one thing that could drive angels insane.

Jimmy was made to watch just how pathetic and far from angel Castiel had become.

The feeling soon subsided as the fallen angel seemed to have sensed the alarm Jimmy was sending out. Which was a good thing.

They made to the warehouse with minutes to spare…or so they thought until a truck decided to take off before the scheduled time.

Castiel's worries turned out not to be a problem for being a former soldier of Heaven, he sure knew how to fight. Even without super angel strength at his disposal, he took out the truck driver without trouble. Jimmy just thought horns should be made illegal but…details.

Another thing worthy of note was the amusement Castiel had felt when his blew up the poor Croat's head in really short rang. Like what Bobby said, talk about domestic terrorism. What was definitely even weird-_er_ than having an angel as a roommate was having a _fallen_ angel as a roommate, for Castiel seemed to show signs of developing a paradox sense of humor.

Jimmy blamed it on Dean.

They united with the elder Winchester again when they got back to Bobby's junkyard, now with all four of the Horseman's rings. Castiel remained silent as the three hunters decide whether to proceed with Sam's suicide mission, perfectly happy to be treated like air–Jimmy suspected it was due to the old habit from being an angel–only spoke up to inform them of the taking of demon blood if wanted to contain Lucifer.

Then the plan was set.

Jimmy no longer dropped unconscious when Castiel took control and it went the same vice versa. However, they–that was to say both he and the angel–managed to fell asleep in the back of the Impala sometime after the harvesting of demon blood and before they got to Detroit. It was a novel experience to Castiel but a once forgotten act to Jimmy–who later figured that their body needed the rest and for that, willingly knocked out both of its occupants at the same time. Needless to say, the thought was more than eerie.

Castiel forced Jimmy into consciousness when they arrive, filling Jimmy with dread–he had hoped he could sleep through the possible second encounter with Lucifer–but the realization that he couldn't sleep if Castiel was awake came too late.

And yes, he was definitely complaining.

It turned out to be the least of his worries after Dean returned, silently informed them that Sam had failed.

The final showdown of the Apocalypse had begun.

_"It__'s starting.__"_

It was just a careless comment Castiel made later when watching the news but Dean didn't seem to be in the mood.

_"__You think, genius?__"_

Jimmy thought the hostility in his tone was somewhat over the line.

_"__You don't have to be mean.__"_

He hadn't meant to murmur out loud. But sometimes it just slipped him how weak the fallen angel had become. Thankfully Castiel didn't mind–or one could also said his mind was else where, for Dean hadn't given up on Sam and wasn't willing to let his brother die alone if Michael really made the move on Lucifer.

Castiel was at a lost.

Until Jimmy couldn't stand it anymore and–despite the fallen angel's protests–called Chuck himself, asking for the whereabouts of the final confrontation between Michael and Lucifer and consequently the whereabouts of Dean and Sam Winchester.

Jimmy knew how much the elder of the Winchester brothers had meant to Castiel. Ever since God–his Father–had failed him so thoroughly, Dean had always been the next in line and everything else come second. It was only right the fallen angel should be by his side until the very end even if…even if all logic said otherwise.

It seemed like Bobby shared the same way of thinking.

_"Thank you."_

Castiel uttered under his breath minutes before they got to Stull Cemetery. It was for Jimmy and Jimmy alone.

Acceptance.

The last emotion before they stepped out onto the open field where the three Winchester brothers stood.

_"__Hey! Assbutt!__"_

Okay, so that wasn't exactly Jimmy's idea for one's last words but if Castiel was good with that, Jimmy would keep his mouth shut. But really? What with the language? He was totally blaming it on Dean.

Then, the fallen angel hurled the Molotov Cocktail of Holy Oil at Michael, his own brother.

And sealed their death.

* * *

_This is my take on how and why Castiel loose his angel-mojo and what he means by "maybe just a speck"_

_Once again, thx for reading, please R&R_


	4. With Thee, Arch of Heaven

_____disclaimer: I don't own SPN or any of its characters_

_____Spoilers for 4x20, 5x22 __Jimmy makes one last choice. Jimmy/Castiel...friendship(?)_

**_

* * *

_**_**ForEver**_

******Chapter Four**. With Thee, Arch of Heaven

There he stood, once again before the Great Gates of Heaven–they weren't technically gates but a visual concept as different people tend see them differently like all the things in Heaven do, but they _were_ gold like the morning sun–but this time Jimmy stood without the angel.

He wasn't alone though.

Hundreds, thousands of people from every race and culture, age and gender, were around him. Walking–drifting?–around the too-wide space that seemed to stretch on and on, reading, sleeping, chatting but not really interacting (never crowding neither as it was odd, considering the number of people there, it should).

All strangers minding their own business, just outside Heaven's Gates.

_"The_y_'re waiting. Waiting for those they had cared about, for those they had loved."_

Even without turning, Jimmy knew it was the archangel Azrael standing behind him.

_"Not many like the idea of entering Heaven alone."_

Still, Jimmy said nothing.

_"You're waiting as well, are you not?"_

Again, the uttered question that sounded more like a statement.

_"He won't be coming."_

This time Jimmy did turn around, glaring straight at the black-clad creature. He knew who the archangel was talking about all right, but he didn't plan to give him the satisfaction. Not in this life. Nor the next.

_"Heaven is the place to be when we live, not after we die."_

Jimmy refused to back down even as he began to debate whether to submit to the urge and ask about angels' afterlife. And there it was again, the bemused ting in the archangel's eyes that seemed to be flitting just out of sight.

_"I do not know."_

Mind-reading should be banned.

_"What do you want?"_

This time Jimmy just went ahead and spitted out whatever he had been thinking.

_"What do __**you**__ want?"_

Right. The cryptic way of the fucking angels.

_"This time God had given you a choice. You have a place here, in Heaven, where you could forever be at peace and one day be with your family. But if you had a greater wish in mind, giving it up would be the price."_

Did it mean he would be damned in Hell if he had a wish? Like making a deal with a demon? Jimmy made to asked but Azrael held up a hand and turned around, refusing him further inquiry.

_"Consider carefully."_

The archangel let it go at that as if he had made everything clear–which, Jimmy had to said, he hadn't–and unfurled his invisible wings, vanishing in the a faint gust of non-existent wind.

Greater wish…?

Jimmy closed his eyes, lost himself thinking about the light-blond of Claire's hair and the shade of Amelia's amber eyes. The smiles he would get if he gave his wife a peck on the cheek before work. The slight frown when he forgot to do the laundry. The laughter on his daughter's young face when he bought a new dress for her on her tenth birthday. The puzzled-look she got when bent over doing her homework, occasionally asking for his help.

They could be together again.

And there was Amelia holding Claire tightly in her arms on the abandon factory floor looking scared and hopeless…but maybe, maybe with a little understanding.

No.

NoNoNo.

They could be together again.

But…could he?

Was he all here?

Jimmy blinked, finding himself asking for answers. Just like the night so long ago when he went to the front-walk of his house, asking for answers.

_"Please Castiel, just talk to me."_

Asking for the companionship of an angel. A specific angel.

What did he expect? Castiel was gone.

What did he wish to have? Was it worth it? To give up Heaven? And family?

If he could have the angel back…?

_"Then…yes."_

And Jimmy Novak knew no more.

Blessed oblivion.

Blessed warmth.

Warmth. It was warm. Really. It was warm.

Literally like when you wake up in the armchair by the hearth on Christmas morning, it was snowing outside but the lasting heat and the woolen blanket would be enough to keep out the cold; figurative like when a child fall a sleep in the mother's arms while listen to the gentle humming of the all-too-familiar lullaby.

It was warm. It was warm again. A long forgotten feeling of warmth.

And…

Flash of light. Not the sharp rays of noon-sun that made your eyes squint but more like the tender glow of night-lights hiding behind a thin veil of silk curtain.

There was this darkness.

Darkness that seemed bright.

Wind. Wind howling but eerily soundless.

All was quiet.

For a while, time seemed to have lost its meaning.

Jimmy remembered this kind of oblivion.

No feelings. No emotions.

Solid wall of numbness. Of nothing.

And he felt bitter.

_"…Jimmy…"_

A nudge. Prodding him awake. Jimmy found himself looking out of–no, at–the side window from the passenger seat of the Impala. It was dark outside. Night. Some time must have passed for neither Dean nor Sam nor anybody was in sight.

Jimmy blinked.

So did his reflection on the window glass.

What the…? He gasped, but no, he didn't really. Only his reflection did.

_"Cas?"_

Jimmy whispered, trying out his voice. He could speak! Though he also somehow knew he wasn't actually speaking. He could scream himself hoarse but only the angel would hear.

_"I am here."_

_"Did…did you do this?"_

_"Yes. It is within my power to do so now."_

Jimmy raised a hand to touch the window. As expected, he couldn't feel the cool of the glass for again–though his reflection moved–his body remained motionless.

_"You are upset."_

Castiel observed.

_"No thanks for stating the obvious."_

Jimmy said and since the angel seemed to be content on letting him go on, he just asked the first question that came to mind.

_"Why do you do it? This?"_

He meant the reflection thing.

_"Because I want to talk to you. To thank you."_

Jimmy just gave a puzzled thought like before. It was two years since they last talked and he wasn't used to it.

_"I knew it was God who had resurrected me…but I also knew it was you who had willingly taken me in."_

_"__'__cause I__'__m dumb enough."_

_"He wouldn__'t have brought me back if you had refused.__"_

The angel continued as though there wasn't the interruption.

_"I want to thank you."_

Jimmy felt a surge of giddiness and resentment as Castiel waited patiently for the emotions of his vessel to fad. Jimmy shook his head if not with sorrow.

_"No, no you don__'__t. You don__'__t feel. Not anymore."_

_"No, I don__'__t."_

The angel admitted, then…

_"But I remember."_

And Jimmy watched as tears dripped down his reflection's face and suddenly felt all the better.

They talked throughout the night as Castiel filled in all that had happened since his resurrection. The final end of the Apocalypse and the noble sacrifices of Sam and Adam Winchester. They both looked out the window then and saw the house of Lisa Braeden, the place Dean would be staying at–even if not for life, at least for now.

After that, Castiel flapped his angel wings and take Jimmy to other places, literally wondering the world like the time when he was out looking for God but different as this time, he kept Jimmy awake and always stick to places with reflectors just so his human vessel could talk.

Morning came and went as the angel walked the aisles of downtown mall with long span of displaying glass-windows that worked just fine as mirrors while ignoring other customers' stares as he seemed to be answering himself with polite nods and simple few-word-comments, for it was Jimmy who did most of the talking now as Castiel never was much of a speaker.

It was like finally getting to know your…well, neighbor as there were so many things Jimmy wanted to say but deep down he knew there got to be a reason for the angel to be doing this. For him. He didn't press though as he talked, all the while waiting patiently for Castiel to explain.

They moved again, to a rumbling bus in the late afternoon's sun. And that's when Castiel found a break in Jimmy's words and spoke. Right out of the blue.

_"Orders on Earth have been restored so all the angels are now returning to Heaven, the place where we belonged."_

It wasn't exactly news as the Apocalypse had ended.

_"Does that mean there__'__s no more evil?"_

_"If by your definition of evil includes vengeful spirits, wendigoes, shapeshifters, vampires and the likes then no. They are still my Father__'__s creations even if they were…s__emi-manufactured, so it was no__t our place to dispose of them.__"_

Jimmy made a dry laugh but was forced into silence as Castiel chose to leave the bus on foot and walked the few blocks to the next reflective surface–which was a broken body-length mirror to the side of a dumpster just between two gloomy-looking multistoried buildings.

_"So you__'re leav–__"_

Jimmy didn't get the chance to finish his question as he saw the person with chestnut- blond hair walking just across on the other side of the wide street.

_"Amelia!"_

Jimmy called out.

_"Amelia! Amelia!"_

But no, of course she couldn't hear him.

_"Cas! Castiel! Amelia is right there! She__'s…she…c__an I…?"_

Jimmy pointed, but his excitement died when he realized the angel weren't going to do anything about it.

_"Cas? I can go home right?"_

He asked, hopeful.

_"I have to go back to Heaven, just like my brethrens."_

Jimmy wasn't really listening though he should, eyes dead focused on his wife until she rounded the corner and disappeared from view. Then he realized the angel just dodged his question.

_"I can go home right? That__'s why you took me here right? Right? __Cas?"_

Jimmy asked again this time with force and more than a hint of accusation but instead of giving a direct 'Yes' or 'No' answer, Castiel settled for a not-needed reminder.

_"I__'m an archangel now.__"_

However, there was something akin to repentance in his tone. But no, that wasn't possible. Nevertheless it caught Jimmy's attention.

_"I__'ve noticed the little changes, and?__"_

There was a pause so long Jimmy thought the angel–archangel–had changed his mind about talking, when…

_"Do you remember Donny Finnerman?"_

Jimmy furrowed his brows about to shake his head then…oh.

_"Are you telling me that I would…that I…?"_

_"I cannot leave without causing you lasting harm. I__'m sorry.__"_

Oh.

Oh, shit.

Fuck!

_"You don__'__t mean that! How could you possibly…? After all that I have don__e? You can't do this to me! God can't do this to me!__"_

FUCK FUCK FUCK!

_"I__ am sorry.__"_

_"Okay, okay. I get it! After all what am I to you other than a worn raincoat? It__'s only right for you to chuck me into the bin when you're done!__"_

_"Jimmy__–__"_

_"Don__'__t __'Jimmy' me! You had no right! You used me and dragged me around and had me killed enough times that I grew tired of counting and now you're about to trash me! So for all I'm worth, don't…just don't…__"_

_"Can you come with me?"_

Jimmy opened his mouth to say something he might later regret, something cruel–he hadn't realized his eyes were wet–but stopped himself.

Was that pleading? Was that? No way!

But it wasn't 'You can choose to be a freaking vegetable drooling all over the floor for the rest of your pathetic human life or be my personal driver and suffer for the rest of eternality' in a tone reserved for business.

No, it was 'Can you come with me?' said in a gentle, kind of pleading, asking for permission way and Jimmy felt all the difference.

_"You want me to come with you?"_

_"Yes."_

_"Why?"_

_"You are my friend."_

This time it was Jimmy who was left speechless. Then, his voice croaked as he whispered his last wish under his breath.

_"Just…can I see them…one last time?"_

Without an answer, Castiel unfurled his wings and flew, leaving the mirror shattered in his wake.

It was a beautiful house though quite different from the one Jimmy used to live in when he still had a family that could called _his_, when they were still one happy family.

Castiel landed in the front lawn and stood there–out in the open yet invisible to prying human eyes–watching the house with the intensity only an angel possessed. All the while allowing Jimmy to access the basics of human senses.

Claire had just gotten home from school as she ran across the front yard, not knowing her father was standing only feet away, and practically flung herself into her mother's arms when the door opened. Amelia gave her a quick return-hug as she hurried her in, carefully shutting the door behind. Then she was cooking dinner as Claire finish up her homework. They still said grace before digging in.

It was doing a bit of favor on Castiel's part as he let a speck of his Grace flow through the bindings to the human soul, allowing Jimmy enough angelic senses to listen to the prayers–both verbal and non-verbal–from his family.

_"…hope daddy__'s okay and would always watch over me and mommy…__"_

Tears.

Actual tears that tasted like salt rolled down his cheek even though his face remained neutral. Jimmy had said his final farewell.

With a final flap, they left the Earth behind them.

Going home.

Castiel taking Jimmy with him, shielding him, protecting him with his magnificent archangels' wings.

They were both going home. Their real home.

_"…to live forever in the fields of the Lord…"_

_**~~fin~~**_

* * *

_I liked the idea of Lucifer and Sam talking via a piece of mirror (I like to think of it as an archangels' __privilege) _so I kindda saved it for the final_._

_And that's it, I hope you enjoyed it._

_Thx for staying with me to the very end, reviews are loved. Till next time then._


End file.
